Comments on: Surrender… http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/ ..not for the faint of heart... Wed, 23 Dec 2009 13:39:41 +0000 http://www.today.com/version-2.3.1 By: thousley http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-19 thousley Mon, 23 Feb 2009 18:43:41 +0000 http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-19 Thank you for your kind words, I am only able to share as those before me have shared, someone taught me how to be open and God himself has removed my shame and guilt...that which draws you in, is in fact, Him... As far as your loved one, it is hard to say how to approach this situation. There are some pretty simple principles, not easy, but simple, to follow. First, a few questions though, if you don't mind...? What is his/her addiction? How long have they been away in recovery? What is it particularily are you angry at? Has their addicition put a harship on you personally, financial, loss of job, lying to you for money, stealing from you...what is it that you find the most appalling and creates the most anger in you ? Is this person in your immediate family, what is your relationship to this person? Spouse, sibling, In-law, relative, friend, romantic interest Who is "no one", and why do they feel it is not a good time to return from recovery? Has this person expressed to you personally what is going on? How is their recovery going? Is your information from them or someone else? What do you want to hold them accountable for? How do you know they are still playing the blame game/victim mentality? After you answer these questions, I can offer what has worked for me and how my relationships changed after my recovery...maybe that will help. Thanks. Logan Anderson Thank you for your kind words, I am only able to share as those before me have shared, someone taught me how to be open and God himself has removed my shame and guilt…that which draws you in, is in fact, Him…

As far as your loved one, it is hard to say how to approach this situation. There are some pretty simple principles, not easy, but simple, to follow. First, a few questions though, if you don’t mind…?

What is his/her addiction? How long have they been away in recovery? What is it particularily are you angry at? Has their addicition put a harship on you personally, financial, loss of job, lying to you for money, stealing from you…what is it that you find the most appalling and creates the most anger in you ?

Is this person in your immediate family, what is your relationship to this person? Spouse, sibling, In-law, relative, friend, romantic interest

Who is “no one”, and why do they feel it is not a good time to return from recovery?

Has this person expressed to you personally what is going on? How is their recovery going? Is your information from them or someone else?

What do you want to hold them accountable for? How do you know they are still playing the blame game/victim mentality?

After you answer these questions, I can offer what has worked for me and how my relationships changed after my recovery…maybe that will help.

Thanks.

Logan Anderson

]]> By: W.K. Chandler http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-18 W.K. Chandler Sun, 22 Feb 2009 20:52:37 +0000 http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-18 Mr. Anderson- I have been reading your posts and have enjoyed your thoughts and how you express them so boldly and without shame or reservation. If more people in the world would share their stories in the same way, just imagine how many more people would get help. Personally, I am not an addict, however someone very dear to me is. Without going into a long story, this person has been in recovery and is returning home in the next couple of weeks. No one feels like its a good time- the lies have continued, etc. Because of your posts, I wanted to ask what your thoughts were on how best to handle this return. I am angry, resentful and hurt and at the moment do not want to see this person. I just need space. When they went for treatment I was completely supportive and truly did not have hard feelings, however at this point I am upset because things have continued and they still play the blame game- or victim- whatever. How can I best respond to them? How do I show love but reality of what has happened as well? Thank you for any thoughts. I feel strange asking a total stranger about this, but then isn't this what blogs are for? Thanks again. Mr. Anderson- I have been reading your posts and have enjoyed your thoughts and how you express them so boldly and without shame or reservation. If more people in the world would share their stories in the same way, just imagine how many more people would get help.
Personally, I am not an addict, however someone very dear to me is. Without going into a long story, this person has been in recovery and is returning home in the next couple of weeks. No one feels like its a good time- the lies have continued, etc. Because of your posts, I wanted to ask what your thoughts were on how best to handle this return. I am angry, resentful and hurt and at the moment do not want to see this person. I just need space. When they went for treatment I was completely supportive and truly did not have hard feelings, however at this point I am upset because things have continued and they still play the blame game- or victim- whatever. How can I best respond to them? How do I show love but reality of what has happened as well? Thank you for any thoughts. I feel strange asking a total stranger about this, but then isn’t this what blogs are for? Thanks again.

]]> By: 2besure http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-17 2besure Sun, 15 Feb 2009 18:29:37 +0000 http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-17 Great thoughts! It is scary, that momen when you have to decide, whether you are going to live, or continue to die. Pam Great thoughts! It is scary, that momen when you have to decide, whether you are going to live, or continue to die. Pam

]]> By: recoveryrocks http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-12 recoveryrocks Tue, 20 Jan 2009 19:57:38 +0000 http://authenticity.today.com/2009/01/17/surrender/#comment-12 I love your blog. This entry is no exception. It reads like prose poetry. Your blog rocks. I nominated it for the Lemonade Award. If you participate in this kinna thing, you can pick it up on my blog. May God bless you and your family. Roxie Recovery Rocks! http://recoveryrocks.today.com/ I love your blog. This entry is no exception. It reads like prose poetry.

Your blog rocks. I nominated it for the Lemonade Award. If you participate in this kinna thing, you can pick it up on my blog.

May God bless you and your family.

Roxie

Recovery Rocks!
http://recoveryrocks.today.com/

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