Jan 06 2009
The Plateau…in multiple parts.
Today’s post will be in several parts. Over the course of the last six years, I have been privileged to teach, facilitate, sponsor, many groups of men in recovery. From Alcoholism, Drug Addiction, and Sex Addiction, I have taught many a class for The Salvation Army’s Adult Rehabilitation Center in the large Metroplex in which I live. More recently, meaning the last two years, with the exception of 2007, I taught weekly for the men in the program. It is in the moments of preparation, that the three years I spent with my two sponsors really took shape and began a long sought after transformation…ME!!!In the days, weeks, and months that followed my sabbatical, I found a safe place, finally, an honest place, in my heart. Once my heart was unlocked I found that which I searched so diligently for many years. In my journals, the man I was intended, the man I ran from all my life, the man I thought existed in me, was actually alive. In my journals, I found my voice of reason, logic, and passion for life. No longer was I left, with whatever happened to survive my latest binge or addictive life, there I began to emerge, a new creation, a progressively whole man, an authentic man.So, enjoy the first post of many to come from the bowels of insanity I once called my heart. The Plateau: Part I: When you are in recovery you have gifts given to you…the gift of the oridinary. The gift of moments of clarity…glimpses in the inner world that you have unlocked to door to…In that moment of clarity, you may not see it for what it is… the glimpse wil be ever so slight…often times even hard to understand how it fits. In my own recovery, there are moments of clarity that shake my foundation and those that slipped by unnoticed. There are moments that come though the musically induced comas I call quiet times, those times when he music has take over and I am at once in the moment of the song, and then BAM!!! Without warning or announcement, the moment comes.. and it may linger or leave quickly. Those moments typically bring about lots of questions, pnderings, musings, and brief insights into my life as a recovering sex addict. I cannot understand them all the time. However, it has become the practice, while working my program, to look for them. Without fail, I will stumble across another moment of clarity in the most unsuspecting places. …until tomorrow… ~T
That is so very true. I used to have a lengthy commute to and from work and had a lot of time alone with my thoughts and the music. Not all of those times were awesome, but they did reveal a lot when the brief flashes of understanding would come. It’s truly amazing how the moments of clarity will show up one day, misunderstood and often unwanted, only to become the basis for a new - better - life months or even years in the future.
Jen
I also worked at Sally’s.
And I am a musician.
I hear the voice of clarity in music.
I hear the voice of clarity in silence.
I hear your Church of Scientology video.
I hear you are a recovering sex addict.
I wanna hear more…
Roxie
http://recoveryrocks.today.com/